Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Read with Caution: disgusting content

We have had lots going on lately, but I haven't posted anything because we actually have pictures to go with them so I am waiting until they are developed.

The kids finally got out of school on Friday. I am loving having them home. Stuart left for scout camp on Saturday and will be back next Saturday. We miss him, but are so grateful that he was able to take off work to go with them. I know it will be a wonderful experience. The kids and I have been swimming and enjoying the laziness of summertime.

Caution: Do not allow Andy or Chris to read the following as we don't want them to have 2nd thoughts about coming to visit us for the 4th of July.

Many of you know that Spencer (14 months-3 years) had a bad gag reflex where he threw up all of the time. We had him tested and nothing was found wrong with him. I have found several moms whose little kids have had the same thing with their kids and really appreciated them sharing with me so that I knew that Spencer was healthy and just had a bad gag reflex. Luckily Spencer has grown out of that, but passed the torch onto Nephi. In the last week Nephi has thrown up about 6 times (thankgoodness we invested in a carpet shampooer) on different days. He is exactly like Spencer was. My doctor had told me that as long as they aren't losing weight to not worry about it. I definitely don't have to worry about that with my big boys. On top of that Nephi's favorite hobby (at least it would appear to me) is taking his stinky diaper off and finger painting with it...all over!!! He has done this AT LEAST 1/2 dozen times in the last 2 months. It seems like I am either cleaning up poop everywhere or throw up everywhere (yesterday was actually both!) I almost want to put a surveillance camera in his room during naptime and bedtime because that's his favorite time to fingerpaint.

It has been particularly hard lately since I have been so tired and feeling sick with my pregnancy. When Stuart went to scout camp I had prayed that Nephi would please hold off with this until Stuart got back so that I wouldn't be alone. Sunday one of Stuart's scouter parents invited us over for dinner. Nephi threw up there. I was mortified. As Shanna and David (scouter parents) totally took care of everything...cleaning up Nephi and the throw up....while I cleaned up myself and changed, I was reminded of my prayer to not wanting to be alone. As horrified and embarrassed as I was I was overwhelmed with gratitude for Shanna and David and a loving Heavenly Father. Shanna also took our clothes to wash. You don't get much more Christ-like than those 2. I am so grateful for their kindness. I always think that I can do it all myself, but it is much more do-able with help.

Yesterday Nephi threw up in the morning and then had his biggest fingerpainting spree of all time. I was the opposite of a calm and loving human being. After I got Nephi cleaned up, Summer watched him so that I could clean and disinfect his room. I think I probably bawled through the entire clean up. Right as I was about to be done, Stuart called from scout camp. Just hearing his sweet, kind voice helped ease my burdens. I am sad and embarrassed to admit this, but I told him over the phone that I just felt like Heavenly Father didn't love me because I have been so sick with this pregnancy and am constantly having to deal with really disgusting messes that make it all worse. Of course he was amazing and assured me that Heavenly Father did love me. That night we had FHE (a day late because with the summer break I have lost track of what day it is) and Summer said that she wanted to do the lesson. She got on the churches website and chose a conference talk by President Monson and a talk by the General Primary Presidency 1st counselor. She listened to them and took notes and then presented her lesson to us. She said, "Mom, I heard you tell Dad that you felt like Heavenly Father doesn't love you (oops on my part...she was so glued to the TV that I thought for sure that she wasn't listening), well He does. President Monson said that Heavenly Father loves us." She gave an amazing lesson and is such a sweet little girl. I need to be much more careful with what I say, but at the same time I am so grateful for Heavenly Father's tender mercies and of a child so receptive to Heavenly Father's promptings.

I really can't believe that I shared all of this because it only shows how aweful I am, but I really wanted to share it because I am so grateful that even though sometimes I feel alone Heavenly Father is always there for us, sending sweet little earthly angels to rescue us.

7 comments:

christy said...

Thanks so much for sharing. I think we all feel alone sometimes. Don't be so hard on yourself. You're a awesome mom and an amazing person!

Park Family said...

Kathy you are one of the best people I know so don't ever think you are awful. You are SO not awful. You are amazing and we all love ya! We all have those days. I wish I lived closer to help you out. How sweet of Summer. What a good daughter. You are sure a trooper! Taylor threw up 3 days in a row and I thought I had it bad nothing compared to you!

Melissa said...

Okay, the fact that you are still composed enough to write all that after what you have been through is amazing. I don't know that I could. I wish we lived closer so I could help. But you are in my prayers. Love Ya! Give Nephi, Spencer & Summer hugs & kisses from us all.

Tara said...

Wow. I am amazed at your strength. Sorry to hear about the struggles. I wish we were closer to help too. I know you'll make it through okay. I don't think this post makes you look awful. In fact most people wouldn't be willing to admit and share so you are doing great! It always helps to share as well because of all the positive reinforcement you receive in return. I hope the rest of the week goes a little smoother for you. Have a great day.

The Tremendous Thomas Family said...

Kathy you are so fantastic and I am soo very excited about the pregnancy! Maybe I missed the announcement when are you due? I are my hereo in so many ways! Hang in there!

Anonymous said...

wow! congratulations! I didnt know you were pregnant and I am sorry you are so sick! i do not think you are awful - some days can just be discouraging. Hope yall are doing well! tell Summer hi for me!

TheGefrom5 said...

Sometimes it feels like it can't get worse than that! BUt those are the times when we are supposed to be lerning something. Something I rarely seem to see during the hard time! You are NOT awfula nd you are WONDERFUL! Your'e a great mom! Thank you for sharing that and helping me to put life and messes into perspective. Because it happens to us all, you are not alone, and definitly not the only one who may not be oh so kind to a child in a compromising situation!! ;) And thank heavens for sweet husbands and children to lift our moods!